I slept with both the father and his son

Dear Pastor,

I am 24 and I have a problem. I am from the country and I had a boyfriend there, but someone told me that there was a man in Kingston who needed somebody to work.

He introduced me to the man. I came to town and the man told me that his wife had died. He said only he and his son were living at the house, but his son was going away and he would be alone. He also told me that he had a girlfriend; she was working in Cayman, but she would be back.

He told me that he would give me minimum wage and the work was not hard. He showed me my room; it was very nice. I never had my own room in the country. After spending two nights at the house, this man and I ended up in his bed. He knew I had a boyfriend because I told him. His son was staying with some friends and when he came and saw me, I fell in love with him right away. He even took me out. He said that he loves me and he would like to marry me and take me to America. One evening my boss came in early and he started to question me about his son. He asked me if I love his son and I told him yes. He said that is alright and that his woman was coming home the following day. He asked me for sex again and I told him I was on my period, so we couldn't. I felt so confused because this man and his son loved me.

I went back to the country and I told my boyfriend about this man's son, but I did not tell him that I got involved with the father. I told him that this man's son wanted to marry me and apply for me to join him in America. My boyfriend said that would be good. Pastor, when I got back to Kingston, the man's woman was there and she was very nice. She encouraged me to have a relationship with the man's son. We got married. His father was his best man and his father's girlfriend was my maid of honour. Even while I was sleeping at the house with this man's son, I could not forget that I had sex with a father and son. My husband left for America and that wicked man still wanted to have sex with me. It happened one time after I married his son. I told him not to discharge in me, but he did it nevertheless. Anyway, I did not get pregnant.

I told his son that I want to leave the job and go back to my people. But I would be going right back to my old boyfriend. I am so confused. My boyfriend knows that I only did a business marriage to live in America so he would expect me to continue to have sex with him. I am really worried and confused, so please give me your advice.

C.A.

Dear C.A.,

You got yourself into a situation that should not have happened at all. This man with whom you were working took advantage of you.

He was a wicked man. I am not sure whether it was a situation where you were so desperate for sex why you agreed to have sex with this man. He was not paying you a lot, but you were happy for the job. You fell in love with his son, so you saw him as a gateway to America, so to speak. But even after you married this man's son, this man continued to have sex with you. It's just a pity you did not pack up and leave his house.

I could see that you are in a dilemma because when you return to rural Jamaica, your boyfriend would indeed want to have sex with you because he does not consider what you did as a real marriage. But can you imagine if you were to tell your husband the true reason why you are going back to rural Jamaica? This older man would deny everything you say. He might even tell his son that you are the one who offered yourself to him and he turned you down. So I am not suggesting that you say anything about what transpired unless you feel that you have to.

I hope that your boyfriend in rural Jamaica would not insist that both of you should have sex, and if he does, try to resist him.

Pastor