Can’t trust this church girl

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you to get your advice on this matter. I was in a relationship for 10 years.

We weren't compatible so we ended things. It was a 'church relationship'. Now I have another girlfriend who I thought was the symbol of compatibility. The church members have got to love her, but it's like the same cycle all over again. Though we had disagreements, we resolved them quickly and we had enjoyable moments and dates. We are both Christians, 28 and 23 years old respectfully. We both are in good jobs and I own a business. She has been a great help in that regard. I have always wondered if I made a wrong decision to date a young lady, however, due to the attachment and the compatibility we experienced, I had no issues.

But my girlfriend, whom I have been with for almost two years, seems to be stuck on her ex-boyfriend. He cheated on her and had a child. Though I spoke to her about her conversations and continuous dialogue with her ex, she continued. She lied to me, but every time I see her messages, she's in dialogue. She even accepts drives from him when she visits her parents in Trelawny. I also found messages of her having sexual chats with her co-worker. We spoke about it, I forgave her and we moved on. She claims she did it because I flirted with girls in my contact list. I agreed with her, however I told her I never flirted sexually in asking for sexual favours. As much as I moved on in forgiving her encounters, I still had a feeling in my mind that this lady I love so dearly was still not faithful. She shows love, she cooks, and I am with her every day, taking her from work and supporting her. We have been supporting each other in everything.

Fast forward to today, I had her iPad, and because I was still not convinced that she was being faithful, I saw that she added her WhatsApp chat to the device. I saw that she had a secret code to access her co-worker's messages on WhatsApp. Please note there is no secret code for my WhatsApp chats. I went further to check her email where I saw motel rooms booked on the same weekend she presumably said she was visiting her parents. I even saw her card history in her email showing a transaction for one of those motels.

Pastor, I have dedicated the months we have been together to be the best person I can be. I have faults but I have never cheated on her. I was looking to marry her but I should have seen a red flag when I realised that she didn't talk much about marriage or she didn't try to find out why I was unhappy with something that she did. She is or was living a double life and I was one of those lives. There is more to it, however. I spoke to her face to face and she's refusing to be honest even though I have evidence. But she keeps saying "I am sorry for hurting you."

I am no longer interested in her because I am broken. This is the third time she has done something and I thought she would stop. I was wrong. I wonder if I will ever get married. Thanks for reading.

B.L.

Dear B.L.,

My comments to you will be very short - stop making yourself a fool. End the relationship with this girl permanently.

Do so today, and after you have done so, don't look back. This girl is Lucifer's daughter. Even if the people in the church love her, you should not marry her. She would bring you down to nothing. Run as fast as you can from this girl. I hope you would take my suggestion.

Pastor