Babyfather’s mom kicked me out of the house

Dear Pastor,

I am reaching out because lately I have been struggling deeply and even having thoughts of harming myself.

I am a 37-year-old single mother of one child, and life has become overwhelming for me. At the end of October 2022, I was forced to leave the home I shared with my child and his father's family. The man's mother had the police serve me a paper giving me 30 days to leave, and that same weekend, I had a painful vision that I would be leaving, but without my child. The next day, three police officers came to deliver the notice, and I had to go. My babyfather showed no emotion and told me there was nothing he could do about his mother's actions.

Since that day, I have been living apart from my son and trying to rebuild my life, but it has been extremely difficult. I cry almost every night for him. I am staying with someone who offered me help, but I often feel lost, alone, and disconnected from everyone. I have even had another painful vision -- that my babyfather now has a new woman living in the same house I was thrown out of, and she is pregnant with his child. Pastor, I struggle with bitterness and hurt, but I also blame myself for not taking time to truly know the man I got involved with. Now, I am struggling with depression and hopelessness. I have faced so much pain in my life. I was abused by my stepfather, rejected by family members, and treated like an outcast. My father left me when I was two and he passed away in 2023. My mother has also caused division between me and my sisters.

At this point, I am mentally exhausted. I sell peanuts to survive, but life feels like it's not going anywhere. I keep telling myself that I have to live for my son, but he seems to be doing fine with his father, grandmother, and their new family. Dr Dumas, I don't want to lose myself completely. I need prayer, guidance, and maybe a word of encouragement to help me hold on. Please keep me in your prayers and, if possible, share some words to help me find strength and peace again.

Lost Mother

Dear Lost Mother,

I am glad to hear that your son is doing well. I am sure he misses you too. You did not give his age, but his father would be very careful not to abuse him.

Whatever the father of your child did to you, was prompted by his mother, who doesn't like you. She wanted you out of her house. Your child's father didn't want you there either. It is so unfortunate that you relied heavily on him for survival. You were not paying rent to his mother. You took it for granted that because you have a child by this man, everything was well with you. So when this man's mother told you that you had to go and you spoke to him about it, he reminded you that the house belongs to her, so he was not able to stop her from putting you out.

From the tone of your letter, it seems to me that you have not even been given the opportunity to visit your son or for him to meet with you occasionally. I suggest that you take this man to the court. I know right away you might be saying that you do not have the money; but that is a big mistake you are making. Contact the Legal Aid Council and discuss this matter with officials there. The court would see to it that you receive justice. I also would suggest that you meet with a family counsellor who should be able to give you spiritual guidance and words of encouragement.

I can assure you that I will be praying for you. I hope you will not try to contact this man's new woman; leave him alone. He will meet his Waterloo, so to speak.

Pastor