Greedy husband has me faking it

Dear Pastor,

I am 28 years old and I am married. My husband and I get along well, except when it comes to sex. Sometimes my husband and I would start playing together from the living room, into the bed.

However, when we are finished making love and I fall asleep, my husband would wake me up again for another round. Sometimes I am struggling, but I pretend that I am enjoying it. I spoke to some of my close friends about it, and they told me that I should fake orgasm, but make sure that my husband has ejaculated before I fake. I have done so, but I know that there are times that my husband doesn't believe me that I truly reach orgasm.

After having sex with him two times for the night, he is still not satisfied. He wakes me up in the morning for more sex before he goes to work. Recently, I asked my husband if he ever gets tired of making love and he said no. He said that I should not get tired, either. I joked and told him that I will invite one of my friends in the bed. I was only joking, but he did not take kindly to what I said.

I am working, but this man still gives me money for the house and pays the bills. Sometimes he gives me money to help my parents. I can't say anything bad about him and let my mother hear. I would not say that he is a perfect man, because he is the only man that I have ever lived with. He likes me to look pretty, so he does not care whether I go to the hairdressing parlour and my nail technician every week. Right now I am learning to drive and he has promised to buy me a car in time for Christmas. I am looking forward to having my own car.

I want to ask this question: Is it wrong to fake orgasm when I am very tired? This man wants to go on, and on and on. Don't be afraid to tell me if I am wrong.

R

Dear R.,

Faking orgasm is not something that I encourage women to do, because some men would eventually find out and would be very annoyed. Some women may have difficulty in reaching orgasm and may have to resort to sex toys. Some men, on other hand, feel inadequate if their women use sex toys. You do not have a problem in reaching orgasm. The problem that you are having is that many times you are tired. So instead of faking, it is better for you to say to your husband, 'Honey I am tired, I can't go up to sex right now.' But in your quest to please him, you fake and you are hoping that when you reach orgasm he would stop.

Your husband is overdoing a good thing. He has to learn that he cannot kill sex. But instead of faking, you probably should just remain still and allow your husband to have a good time until he ejaculates. I hope I am not saying anything bad to you, but not everybody would agree with me. And please, do not joke to your husband about inviting another woman into the matrimonial bed.

Pastor